What is a "Good Confession"?

A defense I have often used has been something along the lines of, "I am preaching the Gospel and only using words when necessary." I have been a covert Christian and hidden behind that in comfort. While reading, the idea of a confession of faith was clarified to me. When we think about our current system of baptism and spirituality in general, the American Church seems to fall short. In Rome, a confession of faith was a quite public thing. Religion has fallen in the realm of the private here, but then, a confession was a public confirmation and spoken declaration of ones belief in Jesus as the Christ. The Apostles Creed is the most notable example of such a proclamation:

I believe in God the Father, Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth:
And in Jesus Christ, his only begotten Son, our Lord:
Who was conceived by the Holy Ghost, born of the Virgin Mary:
Suffered under Pontius Pilate; was crucified, dead and buried: He descended into hell:
The third day he rose again from the dead:
He ascended into heaven, and sits at the right hand of God the Father Almighty:
From thence he shall come to judge the quick and the dead:
I believe in the Holy Ghost:
I believe in the holy catholic church: the communion of saints:
The forgiveness of sins:
The resurrection of the body (or flesh):
And the life everlasting. Amen.

Such a proclamation creates an open identification of the believer with the life, death, resurrection, and sufferings of Christ. I think of my baptism and know that I was baptized in basically a private setting: a pond with close Christian friends. While that is part of the purpose, I wonder if I somehow missed what is at the heart of the issues. Most Christians in the Roman context incurred immediate persecution and I went along with my daily life unchanged. Perceptions unaltered. Hidden and sadly unchanged. My "good and beautiful confession" has been tempered by fear of public opinion and fallen into the shadows. And as such, the confession of those in countries in which persecution is a way of life makes their confession all that much more of a confession. Mine has only been a footnote to my life... and for that I feel some shame.

I am not bashing American Christians by any means. I am just raising the question: Why do I treat my salvation as a footnote to myself when I introduce myself? Why do I apologize to those around me and make allowances such as "I know you might not understand...", "it may seem weird to you...", or "I know this may be uncomfortable, but..."? It leads me to beg for forgiveness from my fear of those around me when my family prays in public. My reluctance to associate in public. I see this as a general American trend as well.

In Confessions, Augustine tells the story of a Roman, Victorinus, who claimed Christ in private, but would not identify with the Church in public. One of the Church fathers would not believe the confession of Victorinus until he made a public confession and stood with the church. To this, Victorinus would reply, "Do walls then make Christians?" In our culture of "acceptance", I find that my response has been the same as Victorinus to those that ask for a genuine stand.... Except, I don't feel that I have been asked for a genuine stand.

Underneath all of this, is my desire for relationship with Christ. There are several passages that talk about leaving all things, counting all things loss, leaving those we love for the sake of Christ, and the loss of our life to gain Christ.

My heart's cry is to be found in Christ and live a life that draws all around me to the reality of relationship with Christ. I want to find a way to have a public Confession.